Marriage can be a complicated situation. You and your spouse may have been made for each other, but miscommunications, emotional buildup, and other problems can cause the marriage to fall apart. Some marriages were doomed from the get go, but if you feel like the two of you just need to improve your marriage, here are a few tips.
Improve Communication
This is a big one when it comes to marriage. Many marriages fail because of miscommunications. The two of you may know each other well, but there may be communication issues that will end up ruining the marriage.
What do we mean? One great example is not expressing your emotions. Your spouse is doing something you don’t like, but rather than expressing it, you keep it bottled up. Eventually, you can’t keep it bottled up anymore and it explodes, causing a damaged marriage.
You and your spouse need to communicate! When communicating, do not use accusatory language. Say “I” instead of “you.” Listen to each other. Bring up any concerns you may have. Trust us when we say that the two of you should be as open as possible.
Go On Adventures Together
Going on adventures can increase your bond. By adventures, we don’t necessarily mean you have to take a road trip, but that’s one option. Spending a few hours hiking, taking a walk outside, going to someplace new, these are a few examples. By staying in the house and doing the same repetitive tasks over and over, it dulls the marriage and makes you want something more.
Have More Sex
Sex does matter in a relationship. Your sexual intimacy will never be like it was when you two first met, but having sex regularly keeps the bond alive and allows you to pleasure each other. Spice things up in bed. Have some fun. Experiment.
Expect Disagreements
Your marriage won’t be without its fights. By trying to avoid confrontation, you’re going to make things blow up in your faces. Fights will happen, and you should learn how to handle them. Don’t escalate things. Talk about it in a calm manner. If tensions do get high, give each other some space. These are just a few examples that can help you recover quickly once you have a fight.
With all that said, you should also take note of your disagreements and figure out how to do better next time.
Notice the Positive
As humans, we love to emphasize the negative. We forget all the times our spouse was nice to us, but remember that one time when the two of you fought. Forget this mindset. While you shouldn’t forget the bad, you shouldn’t ignore the good, either. Notice the positive and write down all the things you love about your spouse. Do more positive actions, such as hugging them, kissing them, and enjoying their company. Be around each other as often as you can, but have some alone time too.
Don’t Be Afraid of Counseling
When one thinks about couples therapy, they may imagine a failed marriage that is being kept alive through false hope. However, strong couples tend to go to therapy often. Sometimes, they may go before a problem gets too bad, and it can help to calm both parties down. Other times, they may go regularly to check on the status of their marriage and make sure they’re doing well.
If your marriage has its problems, there is no shame in seeking therapy. It’s much better than letting things get worse. Try going to therapy, and see what it can do.
About the Author
Marie Miguel has been a writing and research expert for nearly a decade, covering a variety of health- related topics. Currently, she is contributing to the expansion and growth of a free online mental health resource with BetterHelp.com. With an interest and dedication to addressing stigmas associated with mental health, she continues to specifically target subjects related to anxiety and depression.
